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05_OLD JOE CLARK
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Kirkus Book Review 2017
Shuckin' the Corn -
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Farmer Tice Book 1 is rich in vocabulary and satire, and ultimately motivational in its own peculiar way, according to Kirkus Review.
Book 1
Kirkus Reviews says that Farmer Tice Book 2 "I Didn't Mean To Do It" is unpredictable, motivational, and a truly oddballl account of one man's ignorance.

Book 2

Farmer Tice tries to turn an old family root beer recipe into a million-dollar business.

Book 3

2 aliens turn Farmer Tice, possibly the world's dumbest man, into the world's smartest man.

Book 4

King of All Fools

Ben Miller shoots at the flying saucer in Farmer Tice Book #4
Aliens can't stand the smell of Farmer Tice's flatulence in book #4

 Farmer Tice

Farmer Tice, the very best in hillybilly humor for "smart" kids, ages 8 thru 16. Grown-ups like'em too.

Honeybunch is mad as a hornet in Farmer Tice book #4

Outrageously funny books for young teens & grown-ups who want to escape from the politically correct world. It's hillbilly humor will keep you rolling in laughter.
The books kids love to read.

Farmer Tice book #1 makes everyone in the army sick.

Read the great KIRKUS BOOK REVIEW of

Farmer Tice.

Click Here!

{Believe it or not, this book is not just funny--but educational} 

About FT
About Farmer Tice & His Books

Rich in vocabulary and filled with satire, Farmer Tice books are a favorite among homeschooled children. Kids read them again & again.

BUILD VOCABULARY AND INTELLIGENCE AND  CRITICAL THINKING WITH FUN BOOKS  THAT ARE FUN TO READ. BE LIKE A READER ON STEROIDS & LAUGH 'TIL IT HURTS.

 

Farmer Tice books are cleverly written and brilliantly illustrated and there is nothing woke about them at all! These very popular children's books are not only fun to read, but nothing short of hysterical. Nothing is dumbed down in any of the stories. The stories in these books are tailored for kids ages 9 to 15 and are highly entertaining and exciting.

Farmer Tice books contain words of power and turn kids into Super Readers. Check out the vocabulary section of this website for details. However, even though a strong vocabulary makes kids a whole lot smarter, these Farmer Tice books were created solely for laughs. There are no other objectives. You won't find anything PC in these books, either. The stories evolved out of a slightly warped sense of subtle humor that's akin to genre of Mad Magazine, National Lampoon, The Simpsons, and Billy Whiskers. There are no hidden agendas nor lessons to be learned. They are just a fun books to read.

Farmer Tice was born on Friday the 13th. The year is uncertain, because nobody bothered to write it down.

Farmer Tice lives with his wife, Agnes {also known as Honeybunch}, on a rickety old farm in a town called Hokum. They are what you might call "hillbillies". If all farmers were like Farmer Tice, everybody would starve. His wife isn't any better. How the two of them ever got married is explained in one of the chapters. Hint: they both were looking for matrimony at the bottom of the barrel at the same time.

Farmer Tice's first name is Jacob, but everybody calls him Jinx, a nickname coined by Mother Tice who claimed he was a bad-luck baby.

 

Farmer Tice's nephew is named Wessell, but everybody calls him “The Weasel”. It's the perfect name for a scheming, tricky teenager like him.

Farmer Tune is a neighbor who is always taking advantage of Farmer Tice however he can.

Bum Park is way out on the east side of Hokum and is one of Farmer Tice's favorite hangouts. The park was actually named after one of Hokum's most distinguished founders, Horatio Alger Bum II, but that was a long time ago. In recent years it became a sort of sanctuary not only for the homeless, but for lazy farmers seeking sanctuary from their daily chores. Farmer Tice is there so much, some people think Bum Park was named after a bum like him.

Who exactly is Farmer Tice? Well, that's hard to say. Some say he's a mixture of Snuffy Smith and W.C. Fields. Others think he's more akin to Homer Simpson and Rodney Dangerfield. Personally speaking, I don't think Farmer Tice is like anyone you're likely to find in any comic strip. He's a mold-breaking entity of his own.

So, enjoy these stories, and remember the whole point is to make you laugh. The stories are short and sweet and brings us into a world of locals and yokels unlike anybody you’ll ever meet.

 Thanks for reading!

Farmer Tice books are a favorite among homeschool children.
Farmer Tice at a Christmas party. Very funny story.

Farmer Tice drank so much eggnog at the X-mas party that he got to farting and couldn't stop.

Farmer Tice is the king of all fools in hilarious homeschool books.

Farmer Tice is dubbed King of all wine makers, but that's not wine they're drinking-- but highly concentrated prune juice.

Homeschool children love Farmer Tice books.

All Farmer Tice could do was run back to his cabin and mutter to himself, “This is embarrassing… this is embarrassing.”

Famer Tice proudly sleeps
on a "MY PILLOW".

It's high time for some big laughs!!!

Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon    Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon  Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon   Let's go Brandon

the author's other books 
My Novel
Life Ain't Kind
Inside Special Education

An existentialistic melodrama about the perils of a young violinist.

Horror stories in Special Education that

every teacher & parent ought to read.

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Farmer Tice are the best books for homeschooled children.
Farmer Tice Books support Mike Lindell and My Pillow.
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